When a 1-1 defense faces off against a 3-4 offense, China is a bad idea

Communist-dog

From MinivanSam

Hey Bill –

We recently got 2 kittens to go along with our Beagle and 4 kids. How do we get them all to get along? I can’t suspend/fine/cut them. Any other tools in your toolbelt that I could use when things get a little snippy? The two have us have already dropped back into a zone defense but we need some plays.

Sincerely,

4th and inches

From the Playbook:

My first piece of advice is also the most critical, so listen carefully: if you are not currently a citizen of the People’s Republic of China, do not make plans to move there. I don’t care how attractive the relocation package seems: this move will not end well for you and three of your four children. I’m not sure what will happen to the pets: it’s either a one-pet policy or a one-of-each-kind-of-pet policy, but either way at least one of your pets will end up doing hard time with you and your three youngest children while the oldest fends for himself. I wouldn’t even travel there if I were you: Parcells lost a kid over there when he was on a drinking holiday with Pete Rozelle. It wasn’t even his kid, which leads me to my second point: don’t let your kids travel with Parcells, especially to China. I had a third point I was going to get to, but my chimichangas just arrived so it’ll have to wait until later.

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