Hey, Coach, I’m the newlywed of a world famous quarterback from the steel mill area and you seem to have a lot of good advice about men/women relations. How do I get him to take his helmet off during sex? I mean, he was involved in a motorbike accident a few years back and wasn’t wearing one and got messed up real bad. That and the other concussions have him worried about his brain but it is getting in the way of major foreplay both behind and in front of the line of scrimmage as it were. Can you help me?
From the Playbook:
Saying “I do” to that guy — that’s probably a play you’d like to have back. Somewhere along the line, someone dropped the ball and there’s a lot of factors that go into it: parents need to parent better, teachers need to teach better, local newspapers need to report out-of-state news better. Forget about the helmet and invest in some protective gear of your own. Then wait until you’re sure all the wedding gifts have come in, pack them in a van, and move in with Tony Romo, preferably on October 29.