Call off The Goon.

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One of these people is going to jail.

Name: Robbie

Help me out Coach –

I’m known for my party buses and party cruises but now I can’t shake the label! I go to Five Guys at Patriot Place and they give me a Party Burger (with onions). I take the Escalade to the car wash and they give me the Party Wash Special (with undercoating). How can I make the party stop for just a little while?

From In Bill You Trust:

We’ve been over this, Rob. There’s nothing wrong with having fun in the off-season as long as you avoid social diseases and stick to your training regimen. But during the season it sends the wrong message to have your dad and brothers living in a motorized strip club parked in your driveway. Don’t get me wrong, I liked having Goon around at OTAs, but when you’ve got him grilling kielbasa in the end zone during mini-camp it sets the wrong tone for the rookies. In the end it’s not about the party burgers and the fruit spiking and the car washes and the booze cruises. Lawrence Taylor could have done everything you did last summer on a Friday night — while freebasing with an entourage of hookers — and still earn a slot as a first-team All-Pro on Saturday. It’s about keeping off the MyFace, the SpaceBook, the SnapFace and the Twindle, and finding a fall guy whose last name isn’t also Gronkowski.

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