100% wrong as usual

Imgres

From: ArmCandy@NFLToday:

Hey Bill-

When are we going to get hitched? Since you don’t communicate through the press and football season has started and you are holed up in the ‘Patriots Bunker’ for the next 6th months, I’m not hearing much from you anymore.

Are we still an item? If not I need to find me another Sugar-Daddy ASAP…..

Sincerely, 

Linda Holiday

From the Playbook:

Nice try, Casserly. I wonder what your girlfriend looks like.

Imgres-1

Girlfriend in a Coma

Imgres

From PatsFanDoug:

Dear Coach,


I can’t believe it’s really you. I’ve always wondered what kind of advice you give your players and I guess now is my chance to find out because i really need your advice. My girlfriend doesn’t like it rough but I guess I do because all of a sudden she is giving me the silent treatment. I did hear from her lawyer though. In fact I am writing this from jail. I don’t know if you’ve ever been through something like this before but the site says ask anything so I’m asking.

From the Playbook:

I’ll tell you what I tell my players: the horseplay must be consensual. Consensual horseplay is what happens when you’re a first ballot Hall-of-Famer pulling down 98 passes for 1,493 yards, you drink one too many Courvoisiers during your bye week, and you play Twister with a groupie. Barroom assault is what happens when you’re too ugly to get dates even after quarterbacking the Pittsburgh Steelers to two Super Bowl victories. Either way, chances are you will still end up in the playoffs. Then there’s what happens when you’re a disgraced former first-round pick who likes to pick up the tab by shoving your MasterCard down a waitress’s brassiere. When it’s like that, I like to take a wait and see approach. If you clean up your act and turn out to be the sleeping giant you say you are, and you remember to let Tom Brady pay the bill unless you’re at a Hooters, I’ll support you 100 percent and start you in the playoffs. If anything else, I’ll trade you for a third-round draft pick and wish you the very best in your new career with the Oakland Raiders.